Preaching and Prophecy

Perhaps I was really called to preach, especially when it comes to sharing with what the Lord has done through my life. Unexpectedly, I got invited to share and “testify to the gospel of His grace” to this budding church in Subic. The person whom I got the invitation from was a complete stranger to me but he has come to know me through my interviews at DZAS and 700 Club. Also, he is studying now at the Bible school where I graduated.  He is currently the head pastor at a very young age! I am quite impressed. It was a great time spent with him and his future wife and a friend during fellowship. These are one of those moments that I can call a “set up” from God. Unexpected and rewarding at the same time, so I was truly blessed to be able to minister to him and to his church.

Then on July 10, I received a prophetic word from my pastor who prayed for me during ministry time after that Sunday service. These are the words from the Lord through him;

“I saw a long string with a large mark in the middle. This mark is a major turning point in your journey. The enemy has tried to bring you down but God has secured you position. You will come out through a curtain in victory and He will make your resources stable (ministry, career, income). I will give the deepest desire of your heart. I will pursue and chase after your family.”

Prophetic words are conditional. We have to nurture our relationship with God through Jesus in obedience to His words. If we fail, the fulfillment of these words might be delayed. Or worst, would be altered and not going to happen. On the bright side, it is something we could look forward to, pray about, and excitingly hope for!  You see, prophecies edify us as Christ’s followers! These could be words that can turn into His promise if we stay in the journey with Him.  I could not wait for that turning point to happen. However, I am so glad to be affirmed with my security in the Lord, the victory or victories, and salvation of my own family … thank you Lord!

Next month is something to look forward too. I have two Channels of Hope invitation, one in Bukidnon and the other in Kuala Lumpur. Still praying for the Lord’s provision for these ministry assignments. God bless and shalom!

The Day A Dream Turned Into A Reality

Today is Black Saturday and it has been more than a week since the most anticipated event in this season of my life has happened, my graduation day. This and few things have kept me busy for the past couple of months and looking back, I still can’t believe that everything has been done.

After I have sent the letters for sponsors that I have entitled “Road to Graduation,” I have started working more on my thesis while waiting for responses. Many have responded positively! There were a few who immediately deposited the amount they have pledged and there were some who gave it to me personally. I did not realize that there are people who actually believe in me and in the ministry that God has called me for. Although there were a few who said that they would pledge but perhaps they have forgotten and that’s all right.Virtually, I was able to raise the amount I have stated in the letter and pay and bought the things needed to meet my graduation requirements.

The defense was not as nerve-wracking as I have expected. In fact, it was very relaxed and I only got a few but somewhat long revisions so in short, I passed! Additionally, we had photo shoot for graduation, graduation process such as clearance, exit interview and personal preparations. And then we had our Baccalaureate Service, submission of the final copy of my thesis, graduation practice and eventually the big day, which is our graduation ceremony! All these had happened in less than two months!

Well reflecting back, I can still feel the excitement, happiness and also of the sadness for another chapter of my life has ended. Honestly, there is also doubt and at the same time hopeful for new opportunities that might come my way…open doors that God has for me. Before graduation I never had a plan and now it has been more than a week and I still do not have a plan. Although, I have hopes and dreams of serving the Lord again through the “Channels of Hope” work internationally and use all that I have learned from the Bible graduate school. There is one thing that I cannot really run away from now that I got my degree, the very thing that I asked the Lord not to let me do…preaching! I had my first unforced preaching last Sunday and it was indeed a blessing for the few people of that small church community in Caloocan. Their Pastor even has sent me a text message thanking me for the Word of God I have imparted for it still ministering to him after a couple of days.. I still can’t believe that I have finished it for once it was only a dream confirmed by a prophecy and now it has become a reality! Praise the Lord!

In the next few months, I will be updating my resume, look for possible work opportunities, have my regular check up and get my medical treatment supplies, attend to workshops where I was invited to speak, go out with friends, take review classes for Guidance and Counseling board exam, and continue praying for the path God has set for me. In the midst of the temptations and struggles in this pilgrimage, God has been and will always be faithful. He never faltered revealing new things on His everlasting love for us.

Thank you for continuously reading my entries here and God bless us all! Shalom!

HIV, SSA, God and Me

The first 31 days of 2013 has passed fleetingly and a lot of great things happened already.

On the second week of last month, I have shared my testimony through a “lifeline” in one of our class in an almost quite detail. More people now know my HIV status, my homosexual or SSA struggle, and the ministry God has involved me in relation to these two. Revealing the “real” me under my identity in Christ is always liberating, rewarding and brings healing through relationships. People have appreciated it and they were all blessed.

For two consecutive days last week, I shared again “God’s story” through the life He has given to me to few pastors of PCEC to advocate on HIV&AIDS Channels of Hope. Many were called but very few were chosen to participate and listen to us, and eventually realized the serious role of church in the HIV&AIDS ministry.

On the personal side, I have received a prophetic word from the Lord through one of our church elders. This year I will be alone in Him for God will remove (hopefully temporarily) the people I lean on and it will be just me and God, that I will be able to say that ‘God is my delight’. His Spirit will explode and I will fall in love more with Jesus. I guess it is starting to takes place.

This week alone, I have encountered God’s presence twice already or perhaps even more than that. When I woke up two mornings ago, upon greeting the Lord and say my regular morning prayer to begin my day, immediately I felt his presence as I turned on the TV and saw the episode I missed from one my favorite series lately! It was like God telling me that even in the simplest and smallest desires of our hearts, He can hear it and He answers. Truly God can speak to us in anyway He can! Tears were flowing endlessly for almost an hour as I continue reading His words for the day after uttering my morning prayer. This morning, virtually the same thing happened! After praying while preparing my breakfast and as I read today’s word from ‘God’s Little Devotional Book’, His message to me was that, He is a TRUE friend to me, whom I can always count on regardless of what I have done. He is not interested with my explanations on why I have done this or that for He is a friend to me no matter what. ‘When I have made a fool out of myself, God does not feel I have done a permanent job.’ Again, all these made me broke into tears.

Tomorrow, I will be sharing again what God has done and still doing into my life. This time, the focus is where God’s grace is enormously present and truly heals me, which is my sexual brokenness, the SSA struggle. For the past almost five years of testifying to God’s grace through the Channels of Hope HIV ministry, I have been excluding this part of my life. And last year up to early this year, God has spoken to me very clearly that I do not have to hide it because of the shame I am feeling towards it. It is time to really give up my reputation to Him and tell His story that He is writing, without shame, through this brokenness. ‘A changed of heart to love him with all my heart and soul so that I may live is His word for me! (Deut. 30:6-9) And I will obey all His commands and He will make me successful in everything that I do!’ Of course, who am I not to claim joyfully and prayed deeply into my heart that I will truly be able to do this by His grace?

Again, the Lord can use any medium He wants to accomplish His purpose for His glory because the person who invited me to speak met me through this blog! I feel so blessed and very happy to meet this couple. I can feel strongly that God is up to something big!

Not only that, I am still waiting for confirmation but I might also share in a forum next week. With all these things happening in the midst of being a full time student with so much school requirements to finish, I really appreciate your prayers if you can do so.

Each day I ask God to take over and take charge of my life and lead me every step of the way for I do not want to go either left or right. I just desire to walk at the center of His will and everyday submission to Him is the best way to make it through!

Shalom everyone!

Christmas 2010

"For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." Isaiah 9:6

Last December 13 marked my third year as a real Christian, the time when the Lord Jesus was born into my heart. A lot of amazing things happened in the past three years, a lot of prophecies have turned already into reality.

One of the prophetic words I have received back then was that I will speak before different nations and share God's goodness and faithfulness. It started to happen back in 2008 and God has put me in a position this year where I will constantly do that for two years.

Another prophetic word I received was the restoration of my relationship to my father, it actually happened early this year when I got my first embrace from him after our heart to heart talk with the whole family.

One of those prophecies I am still waiting to happen is the time when I will become a father either physically or spiritually. I still remember that I can't believe upon hearing those words from one of our elders in the church. God knows when I will be ready for that so I am not in a hurry.

Christmas is actually a prophecy by Isaiah which was anticipated and waited by the people in the Old Testament for hundred years. Then it happened more than two thousand years ago, the birth of the blessed child Jesus, the Lord and Saviour of mankind.

God definitely has a plan for each and every one of us. All we have to do is to surrender everything to Him and fully trust Him with all our hearts, then all His plans (Jeremiah 29:11) including those prophetic words we have received and will be receiving surely will turn into reality.

Have a blessed and a Christ-centered Christmas celebration everyone! Merry Christmas!

Man of Hope

"Depressed people love to gather around you because you radiate hope. You are able to put a boundary that you do not get into their despair and that is a gift. God has given you that gift because He has faith in you and you have faith in people! When they say that they want to give up, you will simply say that 'you can do it'! You give hope to people."

These may not be the exact words but this is what it sounds like when our guest preacher last Sunday looked at me and asked me to stand up, stared deeply into my eyes when she released these prophetic words to me. Her ministry partner now called me the "man of hope". Everyone now in our church calls me the "man of hope".

I was so blessed that Sunday and somehow I have expected it because I have prayed for it. Boldly I asked God to speak to me that day and He did! He never fails every time I implore Him to talk to me, He's so faithful and truly an awesome God!

I surmise this has something to do with the ministry I have been doing for almost two years now which is the "Channels of Hope". What exactly I will be doing in the next several months or few years, that I have no idea. As long as God will continue to use me in the HIV and AIDS ministry to give hope to the hopeless and be a light, forever I will be grateful and blessed.

Man of hope, that's me and will always be being me.

Praise the Lord for another successful COH workshop early this week held at the Samaritana. Nineteen God's men and women have been trained to be equipped on the HOPE initiative for churches on HIV and AIDS.

My 2009: The Review

Year 2009 started off my second year as a Christian and I have decided to start my third year remembering what happened in the past year and writing a few resolutions for 2010.

First and foremost, I am very thankful for the faithfulness and incomparable love God has shown me. Being allowed to meet a lot of people in the Christian community and minister then be a blessing to them while doing the "Channels of Hope" in the HIV and AIDS ministry is truly a joyful and wonderful experience. Regardless how exhausting it was but the transformation of the participants and the passion it created into their hearts after learning the truth about this pandemic is an utmost importance in reducing the stigma and discrimination. Some of them began executing their plans.

I am grateful for each opportunity that God gives me to share what He has done into my life whatever the result maybe. I am thankful that God is continuously using me in this ministry. This is the first thing I asked from Him when I became His son more than a couple of years ago.

The Lord has allowed me to work for a few months in this Christian NGO and I have learned a lot from this job. I believe this is just a preparation for something better and bigger.

I had an incredible time and experience doing the adolescent reproductive health with HIV & AIDS awareness program and spearheading its pilot testing and training the first batch of facilitators.

Though the latter part of the year was not good, still I am thankful for the things God had taught me through these failures. From falling into a series of sexual sins after almost seventeen months of celibacy, going through an emotional co-dependency for the first time which I am still working out, up to waiting for a new job after my contract has ended; God has been with me all through out even I was not with Him.

The imperative lesson I have learned is that, everyday is a day of submission to God Almighty and never trusting my self especially on the area of my SSA struggle. Yielding to Him every part of my life and believing that He is at work even when I am not faithful is a must.

God has taught me to be more patient and incessantly seek direction and instructions from Him. Lastly, God has reminded me that in all things He works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose for I am more than a conqueror. Romans 8:28.

Before the year has ended, God has spoken to me through my life net group. The Lord has given me Deuteronomy 31 which can be summarized into this, "be courageous and strong for you must go with this people into the land God has promised and the Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you so do not be terrified and discouraged." I believe this has something to do with the discipleship that He's asking me to do.

He also gave me Joshua 3, "consecrate yourself for tomorrow the Lord will do amazing things in you." This one is telling me that I must take my Christian walk very seriously, be transformed by the renewing of my mind so that I will be able to test and approve His good, pleasing and perfect will for me as mentioned in Romans 12:2.

God knows there are few risky things in the gay lifestyle which I have not tried that I am curious to try and I surmise, God wants me to give it up and totally offer myself as a living sacrifice. Well I have decided to surrender it to Him, remove it from my mind and not do it and made a promise to consecrate myself for Him but this time to be fully dependent and trust in Him.

Lord grant that this year I may be more holy and walk more closely than ever in all holy conversation. I earnestly desire to be filled with thy holy thoughts to be carried out in holy affections, determined by holy aims and intentions and governed in all my words and actions by holy principles. Oh that golden thread of holiness may run through the whole web of this year.

This is Matthew Henry's New Year's prayer, this is my prayer and may this be yours too. Happy New Year to all!

God's Words For Me

As I seek directions from God three prophetic words has been given to me by three different people from our church.

The first one was given to me by our senior pastor and he said that the Lord will put me in the fifth gear or top gear this year in relation to my growth as a Christian. If I thought that I have come a little far, it was just the beginning for God has so much in stores for me. This was given on the first Sunday of this year.

The second one was given to me three Sundays ago by another pastor and he said that this year will be a defining year for me. God said that my relationship with my father will be restored and I will be a major target of the attack of the enemy for the huge things I am doing for God's kingdom. I think this is because of the ministry on HIV & AIDS I am currently doing and the bigger plans I have for this to our church and to the positive community. I guess I have to watch and pray so I will not fall into temptations. The spirit is willing but the body is weak. Matthew 26:41.

Last Sunday, I received this word from one of my counselor and ate and she is also a pastor in our church. She said according to God, I will be a father either spiritually or physically. I will be speaking the truth in love for I understand the things happening on in the lives of young people today. I believe this has something to do with my struggles in life that young people can learn from.

I received and claimed all these words in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. These are encouraging words but they depend on how I will live my so called Christian life. I know I have to clean up my act and free myself from any form of activities and thoughts and habits which are not pleasing to the Lord in order to fulfill God's will.