The
Lord never fails me whenever I ask Him to either just simply let me feel His
presence strongly or speak to me very clearly whether with specific words or
simply about anything just to hear from Him that He's there for me always in
times of struggles, joy, and loneliness. Romans 8:28 was brought to me in a
different level with a reason that I still do not know yet but that's okay for
it is an opportunity to trust Him more! And then I thought God was done with me
speaking through this service message last Sunday but I was wrong.
After
church, I paid a visit to my couple friend just to use their WiFi and have a
chat with them but the Lord has a different plan. Well, I was able to use the
Internet and saw this on a status from a
Facebook friend. "If You Continue To Do What You Always Done, Then You
Will Continue To Be Who You Have Always Been! Nothing Changes Until You Make It
Change!" I just read it in a passing manner and liked it then moved on scrolling down. After
surfing the net and done with the emails, the wife and I talked with the
permission of her husband, just the two of us, regarding her very personal
problem. At the end of the counseling, not as a counselor but as a friend, I
was glad that it truly helped her and I felt the Lord’s Spirit leading me all
through out the conversation. Also I realized, I do really enjoy listening to
people and be an agent of change! So I left their home feeling happy, to have
dinner with another good friend. It was a long waiting invitation and finally
it happened.
Over
dinner as I was sharing with him my financial dilemma for this coming semester
and decisions I have to make...he told me something that was exactly has the
same meaning with the FB status I just read! Although my heart was a bit resistant
because I know what is this “new thing” I have to do to make a change - only I
really do not want to do it.... suddenly I was reminded by this status. I guess
the Lord is truly serious to test my faith and obedience this time on the
financial aspect of this life and I really need to pass this test. My heart
skipped as he talked about this because this “new thing” I was referring to was
actually the suggestion of my Pastor when we had our talk several months ago,
which is to send letters to people asking for financial support so I can finish
my graduate studies without struggling much with money. This is something,
knowing my capability to make money on my own, that I do not want to do. In
short, it is more of a pride and self-dependence or self-sufficiency on my part,
which is the kind of autonomy that God does not want for us wherein we always
fail. God’s message is clear; He wants me to trust in Him – fully – with my
finances as I finish my master’s degree.
God
has called me for His purpose and I love Jesus. Hence, all things will work all
together for good. I just need to act on and increase my faith in Him through obedience.
I have got to do something new to make changes, big change actually to take
place. Oh dear Lord, please give me the courage, wisdom and strength to do what
I have to do.
It was indeed a super blessed
Sunday! Lord you are truly good! Thank you Lord for giving me a gift of
discernment, a listening and more sensitive heart.
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